Thursday, September 24, 2009
High Highs and Low Lows
Well, casting is done and so far it's been a hodgepodge of emotions: highs and lows. Zoé is simply a trooper and champion, but we might be asking too much of her.
We shall see.
yesterday, casting day, we spent 3 hours with both PTs to set Zoé's feet in serial casting, made of both plaster and fiberglass. I chose blue as the choice in color was limited: "black, perfect for Halloween; white, not easy to keep clean, and red:' crying hello, I'm here, can you see my feet!!!'"
So, blue it is.
Zoé had to be flat on her belly for the full 2 hours of casting. Legs up. Thank god for DVDs and portable players, for I had her watch her favorite cartoons while she was being casted.
She was a trooper once we got home, but then she suffered during the night. This morning, up at the usual time, ready for PIP to see her friends, and walking everywhere with the casts and boots, that seem rather medieval if you ask me! But at 12h45 pm she started melting down, and has been suffering ever since. We don't know whether she is overtired, realizing that these aren't coming off anytime soon, and perhaps suffering due to the fact that her feet are simply set in positions she isn't used to.
I've been feeling totally overwhelmed. When your child melts down it's hard, no doubt, but for Zoé it is so unusual.
I guess I've been lucky. Zoé is the most resilient, congenial little girl there is, and when I see her crying endlessly, rolling herself on the floor, I just can't bear it. I feel drained emotionally and helpless in front of her cries.
We might be taking them off, if she doesn't settle down. I put her down for a nap 45 minutes ago and she is now crying again.
yesterday we went to Sadie days Cafe a place where moms can unwind and sip on a latte while their little ones crawl everywhere, in little wooden kitchens, down slides, on bouncing balls and red balloons.
An obnoxious mother shouts to me across the room:"how old is your little boy, or is it a girl?",
"She's 21 months old."
"look at my son, he's 19 months and he's running everywhere..."
What am I supposed to say?
I simply say:"great!"
Zoé has taught me patience and composure. She's not about pity, she's about hope and all that she will achieve in her own time, in her own way.